“An actual pet monkey!?” screamed Ross. It was like a wacky TV sitcom, whereby a far-out element is introduced to the otherwise pedestrian happenings, in order to cause upset to the situation and hopefully resulting in hilarity ensuing.
Lloyd walked into the room with a knowing grin on his face and the monkey (called Fred) plodded in afterwards, limbs swinging and weighted. Lloyd kicked the monkey and laughed. He kicked the monkey so as to illicit a reaction. A reaction from Ross or the monkey itself.
He immediately realised the futility of his actions. Not in a causal sense. I mean.. The monkey did howl one heck of a lot.. I just mean.. in an existential sense.. What was the fucking point of kicking the monkey so that it screamed so that Ross was shocked so that Lloyd was gratified?
Lloyd thought about this for a bit, then stopped kicking the monkey so hard.
Walking into the overgrown gardens of Rigdale Studios, Lloyd found a broken glass vase. He picked it up and eyed it. “Perhaps if my actions were being described in a faux-newspaper column, this would be mentioned, as a man picking up a broken glass vase in the overgrown gardens of a dilapidated recording studio would be quite profound to some people..”, thought Lloyd.
“But heck, those people are cunts..”. He threw the vase further into the overgrowth and forgot about it.
Ross was upstairs taking a piss when, after giving it much thought, he decided that today he would wash his hands. So, he washed them.
Reconvening downstairs, the two members of Panda Bear Jones sat on the old futon next to each other. They each looked down at the dead monkey and sighed. Pausing, they then glanced at each other. “Shall we record a song.?...” mused Ross lethargically. “May as well..” replied Lloyd.
A week later, the song 'Stuck In Eggbuckland' was written, recorded and put online. The rest is history.
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